Christmas carols
Christmas gin
Trick or treat
Can’t ever win
Can’t remember feeling sin
Potluck pandler
whiskey grin
keeps me warm
soaks my skin
Sometimes think
to way back when
We lived together
Thought maids’d be in
Laughed so much
Breathed it in
Always said we stayed in sin
I Was so greedy way back then
When you left
Returned to gin
Bottled up
again again
Counted up
To Sally inn
Sober life
Not sober then
Wishing all
Remember when’s

Mom and dad at the lake in the morning

Eggs stink up the house
Remind me of my dad cooking breakfast at the lake
Your gonna eat this it is good
I love eggs but I like when you cook them for us
My sister is so difficult she won’t eat them and think makes dad mad mad
Tanya just eat them no no no
The boys running
I enjoyed the look of the wood panelling in the bunkhouse, the sun shining with at dust, musty smells, no interrupting
I was told already what I am thinking
It’s got to be right
I don’t know me he knows me
He doesn’t know me
But he’s here were at the lake
Mm I’m so hungry
He works hard for us to have what we have
I stare from far
There is coffee here
It’s cooling off in styrofoam cup
Drink it dad
Hurry up
It’s sunny
Mornings the water is calm
He is looking alert
Come on Nicole it’s the morning
I’m happy to see him laughing
I’m sad for him to see him standing by himself
Come on people say hi to my dad
I should be proud he’s my dad he looks so nice with those other people
Clearly they look welcoming why does he care so much what they think?
He’s busy with his coffee
He looks upset I hope he isn’t mad
What does he think he will hear about the night before
People are always drinking
What does he think he will hear from them
It’s my moms lake
Their not gonna talk to him
I’m my dad s daughter
I’m confused why I think he’s mean
He’s nice just look at him there he’s smiling with them
He’s so friendly
He’s coming back to the yard
Better act like I saved some eggs for the rest
Dad why do you smoke in the summer? Isn’t it hot?
There is fire right by your face
Oh That look, well think I should go now
I’m so annoying no wonder I have no friends
I ll just stay in here in the bunkhouse
It doesn’t get too hot in here for to much longer
No one will check on me if they do I’ll just say I’m busy get lost!
I feel embarrassed about telling my dad what I was thinking in a silly joking manner
Sometimes I want him to look at me in that smiling way.
But I must get the exaggerated eye roll or stiff upper lip because that’s who I am
Not funny
Not nice
Whys he so upset how I make him feel now
What about how he makes me feel
I’m dumb for not knowing in time.
He hates me why am I always doing it wrong?
I say the dumbest things
Better get out of the way.

My husband says eggs stink up the house. You know, I never thought about it, I always thought it was just the smell they made, but it does stink when you walk in.

Always feeling sorry for yourself
Why don’t you get out ever
I’m busy
Get it yourself
You ate all of them already
Give one to your brother
Give some to your cousin
You don’t have any anymore
Ooh I like that
These dishes are always dirty
Did you just use that towel once?
No mom
Oh there’s sand all in here
Do nt take such a long shower
You should be able to get done with one dollar, fine here’s two but you won’t have one again this week.
Your brothers get it because they have bottle money
If you found bottles you’d get it too
Did you eat at crystals?

This is my new Margareta maker
Wanna try one
Here I’ll make one for you
Which kind would you like?
They are really good
There you are
Your always sitting on that couch
Go find some friends
Come on Nicole
Oh fine you need to have some fun
Go find some friends
Come on Nicole
I’m my moms daughter
How can you hate the taste of alcohol
Pfffff oh jeez
Don’t be so mean to your sister
Let your brothers have them
Nicole your so paranoid
Come on get off it
I don’t care
Did you want another drink?
Mm they are so good.
Come on Nicole get up crystals here
You didn’t want that much did you?
Oh well there’s none left now.
Nicole. hurry. up.